


Signed, Julie

by kri_rose



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:34:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 13,460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27500869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kri_rose/pseuds/kri_rose
Summary: Julie Molina’s life changes when she meets Luke, Alex, Reggie, and Bobby in 1992. And for the next three years they become family. That is until they die in 1995, and leave Julie all alone to now figure out life without them.
Relationships: Alex & Willie (Julie and The Phantoms), Julie Molina/Luke Patterson
Comments: 11
Kudos: 82





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! It has been 7 years since I have written any type of fan fiction so I am definitely a little rusty. This show has taken over my life though and inspiration hit and I just couldn’t seem to stop writing. Hope you like it!

**SEPTEMBER 1995, LOS ANGELES**

**ENTRY #01**

_Today fucking sucked. I hate everything. This is all stupid and I am tired. Whatever_.

“How was your first day back, _mija_?” Rose asks her daughter, who is sitting at the dinning room table, scribbling something down in a composition notebook. “Did you enjoy your classes? I bet music was fun.”

Julie grumbles and sinks further into her seat. She doesn’t want to respond but she knows if she doesn’t say anything, her mom will start to ask more questions. Which Julie does not want. “It was fine, Mom.” The same answer Julie has been giving for the past couple of months.

Rose sighs, knowing that her daughter is lying. She knows that she is definitely not fine. But every time Rose tries to talk to her, Julie shuts her out. Rose no longer tries to take her to any doctors because Julie would apparently just sit there and not say anything for the full hour.

She feels like she is failing her daughter, which is why she signed her up for a support group that is sponsored by the high school. Rose just wants her daughter to smile again. Maybe play some music. Do something that normal seventeen year olds are doing nowadays; instead of just sitting in her room and crying.

“You know you can talk to me,” Rose whispers, hoping that if she doesn’t speak too loud that she wouldn’t scare Julie. “I am always here for you.”

“I know,” Julie groans. She stands up from her seat, gathering up her school work and the notebook. “I’m just really tired. I think I am going to take a nap.”

She rushes upstairs avoiding the worrisome look her mom is definitely giving her. Today was already a rough day for Julie and talking to her mother isn’t making her feel any better.

Julie slams the door behind her and face plants onto her bed. She wasn’t lying when she told her mom that she was tired. Almost instantly, she falls into a dreamless sleep.

***

**SEPTEMBER 1992, LOS ANGELES: FRESHMAN YEAR**

The first day of school is Julie’s favorite day of the whole year. Everyone is happy to see each other. The hallways are filled with laughter and “hey, how are you’s?” It being the first day of high school, makes it even better. This is the first year that Julie is participating in the music program and she is bursting with energy.

“Hey Jules!” She hears from somewhere down the hallway and soon the crowd of students are parting as Julie comes face to face with her best friend since the third grade, Flynn. “Are you just as excited as I am?”

“I can’t even tell you how excited I am. This is going to be the greatest four years of our lives.” Julie tells Flynn, both of them heading to their first class.

They were catching up over what happened during the weekend when they hear one voice they both were hoping to avoid this year.

“I hope to see you all at the welcome back party this Friday!” Carrie Wilson says to a group of students, handing them all a piece of paper. “My group Dirty Candy will be performing for your pleasure, of course.”

The duo is hoping that Carrie would just move past them and onto the next group of students, but she makes a beeline straight towards them. “I can honestly say I am surprised you are both here. I thought for sure this program was a lot more difficult to get into.” Carrie smiles at them, her head titling to the side. “I guess they just let everyone in nowadays.”

Flynns sarcastically laughs. “They let you in, didn’t they?”

Julie always appreciated Flynn’s wit. It came in handy once Carrie decided in seventh grade that she was too cool to hang out with the girls. It was right after her cousin Bobby moved to town. He’s a grade above the girls and Carrie wanted to seem like she was older to fit in with him; which apparently meant that sleepovers and weekends spent at the roller rink were no longer cool.

It happened over night and Julie would never tell Flynn how much it actually upset her; especially since Carrie has now made it her life mission to humiliate and degrade Julie and Flynn any chance she can. But Julie is someone who cares with her whole being and just can’t understand why Carrie had to ditch them to become “popular.”

“Anyways,” Carrie rolls her eyes, handing the girls each a flyer. “I hope you guys come to the party this weekend. I’m preforming and so is my cousins band, Sunset Curve.”

Julie and Flynn look at each other, practically communicating with their eyes. “Or not. I could care less what you both do. Bye!”

Flynn waits for Carrie to turn her back to crumble up the flyer. “She is unbelievable!”

“Don’t let her ruin what is supposed to be an amazing day,” Julie says, intertwining their arms and guiding the fired up girl down the hallway towards their first class.

“Oh I’m not,” Flynn says, her tone still cold. “I can still hate her and have a great day. Those two always coincide with each other anyways. I like getting under her skin.”

“Well good,” Julie laughs. “Because we can’t let anything tarnish this day for us. This is the first step to what is going to be the best four years of our lives.”

***

**SEPTEMBER 1992, FRIDAY NIGHT**

The night was definitely not going how Julie wanted it to go.

It took some convincing but her parents finally agreed to let her come to the party and even spend the night at Flynn’s. She had to promise not to drink or do any drugs but they all knew that wasn’t the kind of person Julie was anyways.

Thank God she was spending the night over at Flynn’s though because someone has just spilt their entire drink on her and if she can smell the booze, she can only imagine how bad it smells to everyone else.

So now she is wandering around Bobby Wilson’s freaking mansion, trying to find a bathroom. Only it seems like every room she opens is just another bedroom and people have not been shy about using them.

She reaches the end of the second floor hallway and prays that it is at least a room not occupied by handsy teenagers.

Julie opens the door slowly, sighing of relief when she sees that she has finally found a bathroom.

She locks the door behind her and starts to take her t-shirt off. Turning on the sink, she uses some soap and starts scrubbing the beer that thankfully hasn’t stained her shirt completely.

Minding her business, she begins to hum a melody that she has been working on. Believing she is alone, she starts throwing some lyrics out because why not? Bathrooms do have some of the best acoustics.

“It's not what you lost. It's what you'll gain raising your voice in the rain.”

“Wow! That sounded amazing.”

“OH MY GOD!” Julie screams, instantly holding her shirt to her chest. The shower curtain that was just closed is now open and a blonde headed boy is trying to stand up, while also covering his eyes with his hands.

“I am so sorry!” He screams back, nearly falling while tripping over the mat that was in front of the bathtub. “I promise I didn’t see anything!”

Julie glares at the boy, not really believing him. “What are you even doing in here? Are you some type of creep?!”

“No! Definitely not. Uh,” the blonde sputters, not really knowing what to say. Should he tell this complete stranger that he was actually having an anxiety attack and was just hoping for some peace and quiet while he gathered himself? “I got lost.”

“Aren’t you in that band with Bobby, though? Shouldn’t you know this place like the back of your hand or something?” Julie doesn’t know why she is trying to have a normal conversation with this guy while she is still holding her shirt in her hands, but stranger things have happened, probably.

“You know I’m in the band?” He sounds shocked, practically in disbelief that someone recognizes that he is in Sunset Curve. Not many people do.

“Yeah,” Julie says, feeling awkward now. “I have been to a few of your shows with my mom.” _Oh great_. Julie’s cheeks warm with embarrassment from mentioning that she still goes to shows with her mother. This random boy is going to think she is still a child who can’t do anything by herself.

“Not that I can’t go by myself or anything,” she laughs nervously. “My mom was in band and now is a producer and loves to look for new talent. I, uh, like to tag along sometimes, is all.”

“Your mom’s a producer? That’s so rad.”

“Thanks,” Julie says, relieved that that is what the boy decided to focus on.

Both become quiet, just standing a few feet from one another. Julie with her shirt still covering her chest and the boy still covering his eyes with his hands. It should be awkward, especially since Julie just realized that she has had a three minute conversation with this dude and they technically weren’t even looking at each other. It wasn’t though. Julie actually feels calm.

“Uh,” the boy breaks the silence. “Would you like my sweater? I don’t think that stain is going to come out with just soap.”

“Oh,” Julie breathes. “I can’t just take your clothes.”

“I insist. I have plenty of these ones anyway.” He is already taking off the slight pink sweater to reveal that he is wearing the exact same colored t-shirt underneath.

Holding it out for her, or slightly to her left actually, Julie has to hold in a laugh because he looks ridiculous with his other hand across his eyes.

“Thanks . . .” She realizes she doesn’t know his name. She knows that he is friends with Bobby and that he is a drummer. She is also pretty sure that he is in her English class but she never bothered to pay attention to his name. Or any of the others from Sunset Curve, actually.

“Alex,” he laughs. “And you?”

“It’s Julie,” she says. “And you can uncover your eyes now.”

Julie watches as he looks at her, his eyes blinking rapidly from having them closed for so long.

“Sorry about scaring you. I just needed a little breather and this was the only room not really occupied,” Alex laughs nervously, one of hands running through his hair. “If it makes you feel any better, you really did sound nice. Was that an original?”

Julie looks down shyly, not really used to compliments. Especially ones about her singing capabilities. 

While Julie does participate in school, she does the bare minimum. She has been trying to find her exact sound and something that isn’t related to her mom. Her family means well but they have already started comparing Julie to Rose and Julie doesn't want that. She wants to be her own musician. Her own success. She wants to be a legend.

To do that, she doesn’t want to just jump into a genre. She has been experimenting and seeing what flows. And scared of people or her classmates judging her, she hasn’t really shared any of her thoughts. She wants to perfect the sound before she starts letting anyone in. At the end of the day, Julie is and will always be a perfectionist.

“Thank you,” she says. “It is just something I am dabbling with.” 

“Well keep dabbling,” Alex says seriously. “It sounded like something with real potential.”

Julie is about to thank him again when someone starts to bang on the door. “Alex! Are you in there? We go on in five minutes and we kind of need our drummer!”

Alex sighs but unlocks the door, revealing the rest of Sunset Curve.

“Oh, my bad dude,” Bobby laughs, his eyebrows raise while doing a look over at the two people in his bathroom. “I didn’t realize you were with someone. Hey Julie!”

Julie’s eyes slowly get bigger, realizing that to anyone else, this could look like a compromising situation. Her t-shirt discarded on the sink and she is now sporting Alex’s sweater; which they had to know belonged to the blonde.

Hell if she walked into a scene like this, she would think the exact same thing the boys are thinking. She is about to say something to the boys, but Alex beats her to the punch.

“Oh this? This isn’t anything! Julie here, had something spilled on her shirt and I offered my sweater because I felt bad. Definitely nothing going on.”

The room goes quiet, everyone just kind of staring at one another.

Julie is apart of the situation and she doesn’t even believe Alex. She doesn’t want to seem like she is judging him, but his one hand is drumming on his thigh and the other is ruffling through his hair. A tick she has picked up on that he does when he is nervous. But this isn’t a ‘I just got caught with someone I like’ nervous but more like a ‘I need the room to swallow me up because this is definitely not happening right now’ nervous.

“Okay . . .” The boy in a leather jacket and flannel says, side eyeing his friend.

“Never mind that, we need to go on!” The other boy exclaims. “There are a bunch of promoters here and we need to impress them if we are going to start playing the club scene. ‘Cause then that leads to record deals. And then tours and platinum albums.”

Julie knows then, right at that very moment, that the boy wearing a shirt with the sleeves cut off, is the one all about the music. He has a sparkle in his eye that Julie’s mom also gets when she talks about her band days.

“And then we will be legends!” Alex says, tiredly. “Yes, Luke, we know.”

He starts to push the other boys out of bathroom but stops himself halfway out of the door and turns his head to Julie. “It was really nice to meet you Julie. Maybe we can hang out soon?”

“Yeah, sure,” Julie says, smiling. “Thanks again for the sweater.”

“It is no problem Julie.”

“Alex, c’mon!”

“I’m coming, Reginald!”

Julie waves bye awkwardly as she watches Luke drag Alex away. Soon she is laughing to herself.

This night is definitely not going how she thought it was going to go. But maybe it isn’t so bad.

***

**SEPTEMBER 1995; LOS ANGELES**

“Julie are you awake? It is time for dinner.”

“I’m not hungry,” she tells her dad, pulling her blanket above her head.

“C’mon, _mija_ ,” he sighs, taking a seat next to her on the bed. “You need to eat something. You can’t just stay up here all night. Maybe we can go for a walk after dinner like we used to.”

Julie grumbles, not in the mood for another ‘you’re going to waste your life away up here if you don’t start doing something’ lecture.

Ray ignores his daughters attitude and continues to talk. “It was the first day back at school; I bet that must have been exciting. Senior year was always my favorite. Figuring out that I really wanted to take photography seriously. It was the year I met your mom but you know that story. Soon you will be off to college though. It seems like just yesterday you were five years old sitting on your moms lap, trying to learn the piano,” he chuckles to himself. “Now look at you. You are growing up so fast.”

“They can’t.”

“What was that, sweetie?” Ray questions, not really understanding his daughter under all her blankets and pillows.

She jumps up, almost hitting her dad. “They can’t grow up anymore!”

“Julie . . .” 

“No, Dad! I don’t think you understand what I am going through right now and you just keep talking like nothing happened and I honestly think that is worse then everyone being cautious around me.” Julie sniffles, not realizing that she has started to cry. “They _died_ , Dad.”

“I know, _mija_.” This is the first time since everyone found out about the boys death, that Julie has cried. At least in front of anyone. The family has heard her through the walls, but no one has actually witnessed it. And it is breaking poor Ray’s heart. “I know this must be hard.” 

“No you don’t!” She yells, frustrated. “They were my best friends, my family. I loved them even when I hated them. We were going to become legends together. But they died. They left me here. How am I supposed to play music again when everyone is now looking at me with pity? ‘Oh there’s the girl whose best friends died from eating hot dogs right before playing the biggest show of their life!’ I could barely show my face at school today.”

She is full on crying into Ray’s arms, not even caring if he couldn’t understand her anymore. And Ray let her talk. This is the most Julie has spoken to anyone since the funeral and he isn’t going to be the one to tell her to stop.

“And stupid group therapy! If I wasn’t making progress with Dr. Turner; what makes you think I am going to share my feelings with a bunch of random people?”

“It’s for kids your age who have also lost someone or more close to them. Your mom and I thought it would be better for you to be around kids who are going through the same feelings as you are. Maybe make some friends.”

Julie leans back from Ray, nearly ripping his arms off of her. “I don’t want new friends, Dad! I want Luke, Alex, and Reggie back. What aren’t you and mom understanding?” She shakes her head in disbelief. “Can you just go. I want to be alone.”

Ray sighs, “Julie.”

“Please, Dad.”

He stares at her for a moment, taking her in. She is still crying, her nose red from rubbing into his shoulder, and she has bags under her eyes even though all she does is sleep nowadays. But she is still Julie; his beautiful, talented, kind daughter. Only she is hurting and he is now coming to the conclusion that there isn’t much he can do to stop her pain. This is something she is going to have to overcome herself. Because no matter what Ray or Rose do, they did not lose what Julie has lost.

The boys were practically adopted into the Molina family the moment they walked through the door. Whenever one of the boys needed a place to stay, they knew that the Molina’s was a safe place. And Ray became the father figure that they seemed to lack in their life. He was devastated when he found out they died. But he knew that he had to be strong because whatever he was feeling, Julie was feeling it ten time worse.

“Okay,” he whispers, planting a kiss on her forehead. “Come down whenever you feel ready.”

Julie watches him leave, the door shutting behind him. Inhaling and exhaling deeply, she turns to her nightstand where the black and white composition notebook still lays from earlier.

She grabs a pen from her drawer and opens the book to the first page, seeing her first entry again. Deciding to start fresh, she rips out the first page and starts writing.

**ENTRY #01**

_Hey guys,_

_I miss you, so much._


	2. Chapter Two

**OCTOBER 1995, LOS ANGELES**

“How has everyone’s week been so far?”

Julie hates Wednesday’s. Group therapy is every Wednesday. It has only been a month but she is tired of it all.

There are only five other people in the group and none of them are from her school. Which Julie appreciates because no one knows her story. She knows theirs though.

Sixteen year old twins, Anna and Simon, lost their mom two years ago because of a heart condition. Calvin, seventeen and homeschooled, lost his girlfriend in a car accident around the same time the boys passed. Kayla’s cousin passed last year because of cancer and Marcus’ dad died because of a robbery gone wrong.

“This week someone new is joining us,” Miss Melissa announces, bringing Julie back into the room. “Everyone give a warm greeting.”

Julie freezes when she hears a voice she is all to familiar with. “Hey, everyone.” Carrie. Carrie motherfucking Wilson, in group therapy. Julie is begging for the floor to swallow her up now because if there is one person she doesn’t want here, it’s Carrie. “I’m Carrie Wilson.”

“Welcome Carrie,” the room echoes in unison, except for Julie.

“Please have a seat,” Miss Melissa says, pulling up a chair to add to the circle. “Just know this is a safe place. Whatever you say here, doesn’t leave this room. And this,” she reaches below her seat and pulls out a composition notebook. “Is your new journal for yourself. Whatever you write in here will be confidential. I will not read anything unless you ask me to. Consider this like letters to your future self.”

_Or letters to your dead best friends_ , Julie thinks to herself. 

***

“Imagine my surprise when I walked into this room and Julie Molina herself was here. I barely recognized you since you practically disappeared these past couple of months.”

Julie rolls her eyes, clutching her notebook to her chest. Therapy is over and her dad is waiting outside but she decides that she is a little curious on why Carrie is here. “Just imagine my shock.”

“Oh Julie,” Carrie pouts, almost condescendingly. “You aren’t the only one who lost someone that night.”

“Bobby didn’t die, Carrie.”

Carrie scoffs. “I also haven’t seen or heard from him since that night. And you have to stop acting like your the only one who was friends with the boys. I lost them too, or are you so wrapped up in your own grief that you forgot that?”

She is practically yelling and Julie is becoming hyper aware of the fact that no one has left the room and is now staring at the two girls.

Julie starts to become nauseous, not liking all the attention. Especially since she hasn’t shared anything about herself besides her name to these people. She doesn’t know why exactly, but her eyes start to water and her breathing becomes shallow. _Panic_.

“I-I-I’m sorry,” she mutters to Carrie before running out of the room.

**OCTOBER 1992, HALLOWEEN NIGHT**

“And if you get into any sort of trouble, find the nearest phone and call me, okay?” Rose Molina says to Julie and Flynn, who are dressed up as Batwoman and Sherlock Holmes. “Don’t forget to have fun.”

“Not too much fun, though,” Ray cuts in, his camera around his neck, ready to take dozens of pictures.

“Yes, Dad, we know,” Julie laughs, shaking her head.

“You have clothes at Flynn’s, right?”

“Yes, Mama.”

It’s tradition that every Halloween, Julie and Flynn go trick-or-treating and then finish the night at Flynn’s watching horror films. Except this year they are not doing that. Ray and Rose don’t know that though.

Julie doesn’t like lying to her parents but what they don’t know won’t hurt them; she hopes. She’s a teenager and she wants to have fun. It just so happens that this years Halloween fun is a party at Bobby’s and the whole school is going to be there.

The girls let Ray take a few pictures before they are rushing out of the door, saying they need to go before all the good candy is gone.

“I hate lying to them,” Julie reveals to Flynn as they head for Bobby’s house. It isn’t far from Julie’s, which comes in handy since the girls can’t drive yet and neither wanted to ask for money from their parents for a taxi.

“Me too, girl. But we are teenagers and we are meant to rebel a little.”

  
  


***

The party is in full swing when the girls get there. The music is loud and Julie is pretty sure if it wasn’t for the fact that Bobby’s house is on top of a hill, the cops would be here already.

“I’m going to go find Willie,” Flynn shouts into Julie’s ear. “Will you be okay?”

“Yeah,” Julie shouts back. “Definitely!”

Definitely not. Last time Julie was left alone at a party, someone decided to spill their whole drink on her. She did end up meeting Alex though. She hasn’t spoken to him since that night but she also has barely seen him. She has one class with him but it is AP, so there isn’t much time for talking and catching up.

“Tell Willie I say hi,” she smiles at Flynn and watches as her friend turns, leaving her all alone.

Well not for long.

She is looking for a drink when she feels a tap on her shoulder, making her turn her head and come face to face with Alex. “Hey Julie!”

“Alex, hey,” Julie smiles at him. “How are you?”

“Good, good.” He looks around before his eyes focus back on her. “Did you come by yourself?”

Julie shakes her head. “No, I actually came with my friend Flynn but she had to go talk to her friend Willie for a few minutes.”

Alex freezes and he knows his eyes are slightly wider than they were before. He doesn’t want to make it seem obvious that just the name makes him panic, even if he is only talking to Julie, so he clear his throat and says, “Did you want to hang out with the guys and I? We are going to play in about thirty minutes but I’m sure the boys won’t mind.”

Julie hesitates, not because she doesn’t want to but because the last time she saw the boys of Sunset Curve, they thought Alex and her were doing things. She knows it was all innocent but the boys didn’t seem to think so.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to,” Alex rushes out since Julie still hasn’t answered.

She looks around the room. She hasn’t seen Flynn since they departed almost ten minutes ago and who knows when she will pop up again. And Alex will be there if things get awkward, which Julie believes is a plus.

“No uhm,” Julie grabs a random bottle from the bin filled with ice and smiles at Alex. “Lead the way.”

He smiles, “okay.”

***

Julie has only been to Bobby’s house three times, and that is including tonight. The first time she came to the ‘Manor on the Hill’ was when Bobby’s family first moved here and he invited Julie and Flynn over because of their connection to Carrie.

It was a small party and it was the night that Carrie decided that Julie and Flynn were no longer cool enough to hang out with. She doesn’t talk about it much because it was borderline humiliating to the point where she didn’t want to show her face in school the next day.

But she got over it, sort of.

“Hey Molina,” Bobby acknowledges her as Alex holds the door open. It looks like an office that has been modified to look kind of like a green room. “Good to see you again.” His eyebrows are raised, just like they were last month when he and the boys walked into the bathroom.

“Hey Bobby,” Julie coughs. “Good to see you too, I guess.” She puts some distance between her and Alex, hoping that the boys won’t say or do anything else about ‘the elephant in the room.’

It’s not that Julie hates Alex or anything, quite the opposite actually. She just doesn’t like him like how the boys probably think she does. She also has a feeling that Alex likes someone and it is definitely not her.

“Bobby, cut it out. It isn’t like that and you know it,” Alex says, shutting the door and moving over to the couch.

“Oh I know,” Bobby laughs. “I just like busting your balls.”

“Don’t mind him. I’m Luke, by-by the way.” The browned hair boy holds his hand out for Julie to shake, and she grasps it, smiling.

“Reggie! I’m Reggie.”

Julie laughs, happy that Reggie’s enthusiastic tone breaks the intense eye contact she and Luke were giving each other.

“Julie,” she says, sitting down next to Alex on the couch, feeling a little more comfortable now.

“We know,” Reggie says. “You’re in the music program, right?”

“Mhm,” she mumbles, looking down at her feet.

“Molina’s super talented,” Bobby says, tuning his guitar, not looking at anyone else in the room.“At least enough that Carrie is constantly ranting on how she needs to be better than you.”

Julie is shocked to hear that. Carrie always makes it seem like she doesn’t think Julie has talent, or at least enough to be in the music program.

“Being the daughter of Rose Molina, you have to be talented though.”

Julie rolls her eyes, not meaning to come off rude but she kind of can’t control it. She knows it should be a compliment and that Bobby is just trying to be nice but she is just so tired of people comparing her to her mom.

“Rose Molina? Like from Rose and the Petal Pushers, Rose Molina?” Reggie asks, nearly bouncing. “Holy shit!”

“You know about my moms band?”

“Of course we do!” Luke chimes in. “Reggie’s mom was a huge fan and actually took us to one of the concerts when we were like seven. It was awesome!”

Sometimes Julie forgets that her mom only became a full time producer three years ago. Before that, Rose was touring all over North America with her band and if they toured during the summer, Julie got to tag along.

“That concert is actually what made us want to start playing instruments,” Reggie admitted. “Luke and I had to beg our parents to take us to lessons. That’s how we met Alex, though.”

“And how did you fit into the picture?” Julie questions Bobby, actually curious on how Sunset Curve came to be. Especially since Bobby is a year older and a grade above everyone else in the room.

“Oh this guy,” Alex laughs, pointing at Bobby. “He heard us playing in the band room one time last year while he was looking for Carrie and practically begged us to join our little band.”

Bobby puts down his guitar and points his finger right back at Alex, “I did not beg.”

A chorus of scoffs is heard around the room, and Julie laughs. “I think the band has spoken and it is three to one.”

“I didn’t beg!” He says, throwing a pillow in Julie and Alex’s direction. He’s laughing though andsoon everyone joins in.

Julie doesn’t want to sound cliche but she feels like these guys are about to change her life. Sitting on some fancy couch between Alex and Reggie, Luke on the floor across from her, and Bobby on the lounge chair in the corner; she doesn’t even realize that these guys are about to become her family.

A family that gets taken away far too soon for her liking.  
  


**OCTOBER 1995, LOS ANGELES**

“How was therapy?” Ray asks his daughter as she gets into the backseat of the car.

“Fine,” she responds, pulling out her Walkman from her book bag and letting the music drown out everything else while she began to write in her notebook.

**ENTRY #05**

_Luke,_

_Carrie came to therapy today. Can you believe that? Everyone hung onto her every word and I just had to sit there. You must know how badly I wanted to run out of the room but I knew that is exactly what she wanted._

_Never let Carrie see how much she bothers you. It only fuels her on._

_You told me that the first time we talked in the hallway and Carrie walked by making some stupid comment that I can’t even seem to remember what it was about. You probably do. You remembered everything._

_School sucks without you there. Whenever I was feeling down, you would make some stupid comment or just smile my way and everything would seem better._

_I miss your smile._

_Everything sucks without you guys here._

_These letters have been nice but I think I finally figured out why I don’t talk in therapy_ _or tell my parents how I am feeling. Why I haven’t cried since that day at the Orpheum._

_I am so pissed at you, Reggie and Alex because at least you guys are together. You left me here to fend for myself. You have been a huge part of my life for the past three years, that I honestly don’t know how to go on without you guys here; supporting me every step of the way._

_And I hate that that is what my life has come to. I hate everyone’s pity looks because I know exactly what they are thinking._

_There goes Julie Molina, the singer who hasn’t sang a word since her three best friends died. The girl who just looks lonely now because she no longer has a group around her everywhere she goes._

_Flynn tries her best and I love her for that but I know Willie needs her more than I do._

_I need you guys though. How am I supposed to get past this? How can I possibly move on with my life and grow old when you guys aren’t there to grow old with me? How can I ever love someone else that isn’t you, Luke?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry the second chapter took so long! I have been exhausted from work and it honestly took me a little to figure out how I wanted to start this chapter. I hope you are liking it so far though!


	3. Chapter Three

**NOVEMBER 1992, LOS FELIZ HIGH SCHOOL**

“Do you guys have any plans for Thanksgiving?” Willie questions Julie and Flynn as they all sit down at table outside.

Lunch is the only time that the girls get to see Willie during school hours. He’s a sophomore like Bobby but instead of music, he’s in the art program. The only reason Julie knows Willie is because Flynn dragged her to a painting class this past summer and it was being co-lead by Willie. 

At first Julie thought that Flynn had a crush on Willie, but then she saw them interact and knew it was something more along the lines of a brother and sister relationship. 

“My parents and I always goes to my grandparents house in San Diego,” Flynn says. “I won’t be back until the day before school starts back up again. Which sucks.”

“I’m stuck here,” Julie sighs. “The rest of my family lives out east so it just going to be my parents, Carlos, and my _tia_ Victoria.” 

Julie has a lot to be thankful for, she knows that. Her parents support her in everything she does. Carlos, her younger brother, can be annoying at times but he means well. And no matter how overbearing her _tia_ can be, Julie knows she can count on her for anything. 

She knows she has nothing to complain about, but sometimes it just feels like something is missing. Like a missing puzzle piece.

“Hey Julie!” 

“Reggie!” Julie smiles, patting the seat next to her. She’s only seen him and Luke in passing since the Halloween party. Alex switched seats in English so that they could talk more but none of them have hung out since that night. “How’s it going?”

“Awesome, actually.” Reggie says, shoving french fries into his mouth. “You’ve heard of Battle of the Bands, right? Oh who am I kidding, of course you have. Well Sunset Curve got a slot!”

Julie grasps onto his arm, not being able to stop her enthusiasm. Reggie’s excited puppy personality is infectious. “That’s great! My mom and I will be there.”

“Alex has said your mom’s a fan. That’s so cool,” Reggie smiles. “Maybe we can get you backstage passes. My mom will be there and she will die if she could meet yours.”

“Isn’t your mom on the board for Battle of the Bands?” Flynn questions Julie, looking at her strangely.

It is at that moment that Julie realizes that she has never talked to Flynn about her new ‘friendship’ with the Sunset Curve boys. Julie met up with Flynn and Willie once the boys had to go on at the Halloween party and it just didn’t seem like something she had to bring up. 

But now she knows that it must look weird to the other two people how Reggie just sat down and practically made himself comfortable next to her.

“Wait, seriously?” Reggie looks at her wide eyed. “Should we pretend not to know each other then so it doesn’t look like favoritism?”

“Doesn’t what look like favoritism?”

Julie nearly chokes on her water as Luke sits down on her right side. Alex is right behind him, looking nervous as he takes the seat next to Willie. 

Flynn is now giving Julie a look that says ‘you have a lot of explaining to do.’ Julie smiles at her anxiously before clearing her throat, answering Luke’s question, “My mom is on the board for Battle of the Bands, but not a judge, so it’s fine if you guys are seen talking to her.”

“We get to meet your mom?” Luke says excitingly. “Sweet.” 

“Well don’t get your hopes up too much boys. She might be super busy that day.” Alex says, giving Julie a supportive look. “You will be there though, right?”

“I will.” Julie smiles at Alex, appreciating him changing the subject. 

Flynn clears her throat, “Uh, hello. I’m Flynn. I don’t think we have been introduced.”

“I’m Luke,” he says, flashing his signature smile. 

“Reggie!”

“Alex, hi.”

“And that’s most of Sunset Curve,” Julie says.

Reggie adds, “Tell your friends!”

Willie laughs, “Well I am the girls only other friend. Hey, I’m Willie.” He holds his hand out for Alex and Julie watches the panic fill his eyes. She ends up tapping his leg underneath the table, and he seems to break out of whatever is going through his head. 

“Hi.” 

“Anyways . . . “ Luke says, breaking the quietness. “Are you guys coming to the Battle as well?”

“I can’t. Going away over break,” Flynn says. “I’m sure Julie will tell me all about it though.”

That’s a dig and Julie knows it. She knows she should have told Flynn about the boys, but she has only hung out with them once and only talks to Alex during English. There isn’t much to talk about, or at least that is what she thought. 

“I can try to make it. It’s Saturday, right?”

Julie looks at Alex, encouraging him to answer Willie. At least she hopes it looks like she is encouraging him. He doesn’t say anything though and continues to play with the food that is on his tray. 

“Yeah, we can leave your name at the entrance. It will be cool to have some support there,” Luke says. 

Julie is about to add something when the bell rings, signaling that lunch is over. The boys say their goodbyes and head to their classes. Julie is about to get up as well when Flynn stops her. 

Willie takes one look at them and knows immediately that he doesn’t need to be there for the conversation. “See you tonight Flynn. And I will see you on Saturday, Julie.”

“See ya, Willie.” Julie waits for him to get out of ear shot before asking Flynn, “is everything okay?”

They both stand up, throw their trays away, and start heading to the music room. It is both their free period and they know the room will be empty. 

“You tell me, Jules. When did you become friends with the Sunset Curve boys?”

Julie sighs, “I wouldn’t really say I’m friends with them.” 

“Really?” Flynn asks, accusingly. “Because it seems like they were really excited that you were coming to see them play. And also really looking forward to meeting your mom.”

“That’s only because they are fans of her old band,” Julie shrugs. 

Flynn nods her head, “Sure.” She then sighs. “Why did you think you had to hide those cute boys from me?”

“It’s not like that, Flynn,” Julie shakes her head. “I’ve only hung out with all them at the Halloween party. I didn’t think they were all going to be joining us for lunch today.”

“The Halloween party? That was almost a month ago, Jules! Is there anything else you aren’t telling me?”

Julie freezes, not really knowing where this conversation is going to be going. “Why is it such a big deal that I might be becoming friends with them?”

“It’s not that you are becoming friends with them,” Flynn says. “It’s that we have barely hung out like we used to and I didn’t even know that you were making new friends. We never keep secrets from each other.”

“You’ve been busy with Willie, lately.” Julie mutters. “Look Flynn. We are in high school now. We are both bound to make new friends but the reason I didn’t tell you about the guys is because it’s still pretty much new. That’s the second time I have even talked to Luke and Reggie. Yes, I have class with Alex so we talk there. But I wouldn’t consider them friends yet.” 

She grabs Flynn’s hands, making sure that she is really listening to her. “And besides, no one will ever come in between me and my best friend. We have been through so much together and I wouldn’t have been able to get over any of my fears without you. You support me no matter what and I will always support you, okay?” She stops before letting go of Flynn’s hands and holding up her pinky, “Double trouble?”

Flynn sighs, shaking her head, “Double trouble.” The girls hug, both smiling. “But you are definitely telling me everything that goes down at the Battle of the Bands once I get back from San Diego.”

“Deal.” Julie laughs.

***

**NOVEMBER 1995, LOS ANGELES**

“Julie, we have something important to tell you.”

Rose and Ray Molina take a seat next to Julie at the dinning room table. Both are anxious, not really knowing how Julie is going to react.

“What is it?”

The two adults look at each other before looking back at their daughter. “We just got off the phone with Emily and Mitch.” Julie takes in a noticeable breath. Ray and Rose each take one of Julie’s hands. “The boys death has been ruled homicide.”

“What?” Julie questions, already on the verge of tears. 

“The street dogs they ate had battery acid on them, honey. The owners also didn’t have a permit. They are being charged with third degree.”

“So there is going to a trial?” 

Her tone is soft, almost scared. Julie feels like she is ten again. Not really knowing what is going on and just going through the motions. She feels like her soul has left her body and she is just watching her lifeless self from afar. 

She doesn’t know if she can handle sitting through a trial. Hearing everyone talk about the boys or see the looks on any of their parents faces. She can barely come to terms with what happened and then sit through a murder trial?

“Yes, _mija_ ,” Rose sighs, looking at Julie with sadness. She knows her daughter is already going through enough. And she didn’t really want to be the one to break the news to her but she knows everyone will be talking about it once Thanksgiving break is over. “You don’t have to go if you don’t want to.”

“It’s going to take a little bit for it to actually go to trial, if it even does. They might just come to an agreement.”

 _Agreement_? How can the lives of three rising legends be settled with an agreement? Three boys who were the kindest, funniest, and most talented group of guys in all of Los Angeles. They don’t deserve some agreement. They deserve to be here. 

“I need to go.”

“Julie!” Both Ray and Rose scream after her, but the front door is already slammed shut. 

Julie walks around mindlessly for almost an hour. That is until she comes across a coffee shop that she is all too familiar with. 

_Cup of JOyner_ , owned by Deanna Joyner, Alex’s older sister. 

The boys and her have spent so much time after school there. It was their “spot.” So many songs were written in those booths. So many inside jokes shared between them. Just like Julie’s house, it was a safe place. Warm. 

Now it’s cold as Julie walks up to the front counter. She doesn’t know what she wants, but she needed to be somewhere familiar that wasn’t around her parents. 

“Julie?” 

When she turns around, she does not expect to see Flynn, Willie, and Carrie sitting in a booth together. They all have food, so Julie conducts that Carrie being there isn’t just a fluke. All three of them are hanging out. Without Julie. 

“What are you guys doing here?” She asks, knowing she might sound a little rude. But what the fuck. 

“We didn’t really know where else to go,” Willie speaks up, looking between all the girls. “So we came here.”

 _We_. Julie just knows that they all have been hanging out. Flynn, Willie and Carrie motherfucking Wilson. Has she really been so lost in her own head that she hasn’t realized they have been hanging out again?

“All of you?” Julie looks between the three of them. “When did this start happening?”

“What did you think was happening Julie?” Flynn looks at Julie right in the eyes. Julie doesn’t think she has ever heard her best friend so serious. “Luke, Reggie, and Alex died. And honestly, I think you died with them. You aren’t the same Jules. We never hang out anymore. You barely text me back.”

Flynn sighs and Julie starts to become uncomfortable. “Us three have been trying to move on with our lives while you are just stuck in some limbo state.”

“Move on?” Julie interrogates. “It’s only been six months! And now your fucking best friends with Carrie? The same Carrie who ditched us in middle school because we weren’t cool enough anymore for her?!” 

“That’s really what your worried about, right now?” Carrie stands up and walks towards Julie. “We all just found out that our friends have practically been murdered and you’re focused on the fact that Flynn and I have become friends again? I will say this a second time; you have got to stop acting like you are the only one who lost them.”

Julie opens her mouth to say something but Carrie holds up her hand, “I’m not finished.” 

She sighs, but continues, “it has been only six months but we also have lives, Julie. What happened to them fucking sucks and it is damn sad. Why do you think I am in therapy with you? But these two people understand what I am going through. I can’t talk to Bobby. But I know Flynn and Willie get it. Which is why we are here.”

Flynn cuts in, “We would have invited you if you haven’t been ignoring me.”

The three girls are quiet, just staring at each other. No one really knowing what to say. 

Julie knows they are right. She has been stuck in limbo. Nothing has been the same and she has had no motivation to do anything. Not even talk to her best friend about how she has been feeling. 

But she still can’t picture herself moving on. How can she have fun when the boys are dead? How can she make jokes with her friends when Reggie isn’t there to egg her on? How can she talk about her anxiety when Alex isn’t there to calm her down? And how can she sing music again when Luke isn’t there to help her come up with the melodies?

This is something that Julie thinks she will never get over. Everyone will be moving on, her friends included and she will be stuck as the closed off girl. A shell of a person. Hollow. And right now, Julie is okay with that. 

“I think I’m going to go.”

“Jules,” Flynn sighs.

“No, it’s fine,” Julie says. “You guys have a good rest of your night. I’m just not ready for,” she waves her hand in their general area, “this.”

And she leaves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiya! 
> 
> Thanks to everyone who has been giving this story a chance! I appreciate the comments and kudos! You guys are the only ones who understands my obsession with this dang show.
> 
> I am still trying to figure this site out (my old fanfics were on a different site and the format was definitely different) so please be patient while I figure this stuff out. 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed!!


	4. Chapter Four

**NOVEMBER 1995, LOS FELIZ HIGH SCHOOL**

It’s the day before Thanksgiving but a group therapy session is still being held. Miss Melissa says that the holidays are the worst for people who are still grieving and said the session is still open for anyone who felt like they needed it. Julie needs it.

The conversations from two days ago is still running through her mind on repeat. Her parents saying that the boys were murdered (on a technicality) and that there is a possibility of a trial. And the one with Flynn, Carrie, and Willie. She knows in some way they are right but she also didn’t expect for them to be so harsh. Everyone grieves differently. It isn’t a crime to not really want to talk to anyone anymore.

“Hey Julie!” She is about to walk through the doorway when she hears Carrie from down the hall. “Wait!”

She almost walks faster into the room. Almost. But something makes her stop and turn to see Carrie approaching her.

“Look,” Julie sighs. “About the other day . . .”

“That’s actually what I wanted to talk to you about.” Carrie pauses and Julie raises an eyebrow at her. “Flynn and I are sorry about how we came across. We know that everyone grieves differently and that this whole situation is different for you. It’s just,” she sighs. “You need to talk about it, Julie. All this bottled up anger and grief isn’t good for you. You don’t even have to talk about how they died. Just talk about them.”

Julie opens her mouth, ready to spit some random words that would probably be really rude, but she stops herself. Because sadly, Carrie is right.

It has been six months and she hasn’t talked to anyone. Not her therapist, or her parents (at least not really), and definitely not her friends. Not that Carrie is her friend or anything. But maybe just telling a few stories about the boys will be okay. The kids in group therapy don’t need to know how they died. They don’t need to know how badly it is affecting Julie and how is has practically scared her from ever singing again.

“Okay.”

“Wait really?” Carrie asks and Julie nods her head. “Okay. After you.”

Julie takes a deep breath but walks into the classroom first, Carrie following right behind her.

“Julie, Carrie, welcome!” Miss Melissa exclaims. “I am so happy that everyone has decided to attend today. Take a seat girls.”

Everyone is watching the two girls as they sit in the only seats that aren’t taken, right next to each other.

“Now that everyone is here, does anyone want to start? Maybe share some Thanksgiving stories?”

Carrie looks at Julie, nodding her head as if to say ‘go ahead!’ Julie looks around the room, seeing that everyone is now giving her the same look that Carrie is giving her.

She nervously laughs, trying to sink into her seat. “I uh,” she clears her throat. “I guess I can share?”

“That would be amazing, Julie.” Miss Melissa says, smiling widely.

_Oh boy_ , Julie thinks.

She feels her leg starting to bounce but it is like she can’t control it. Her hand starts to tap her leg and she feels like she has forgotten to breathe.

Carrie reaches over and grabs Julie’s hand, nearly scaring the other girl to death. Julie eyes are wide as she looks at Carrie, but Carrie just smiles back. And in some way, it calmed her.

“Okay,” Julie sighs. “This didn’t happen on Thanksgiving but afterwards. It still counts, I guess. It was 1992’s Battle of the Bands . . .”

***

**NOVEMBER 1992, SATURDAY, BATTLE OF THE BANDS**

“I can’t believe you wanted to come to this, Dad,” Julie says to her father as they walk through the back entrance.

Battle of the Bands was always a Rose and Julie thing but she was shocked this morning when both her dad and brother said they were joining them. Usually the two guys find something to do while the girls are gone all day. Not this year apparently. And it’s the one year Julie definitely doesn’t want her dad here.

“Well I missed taking performance photos since your mom hasn’t toured,” Ray says, ruffling his daughters hair. “I figured I can become more versatile this way.”

“Great,” Julie says, not hiding her sarcasm at all. “Just don’t do anything embarrassing.”

“Me? Embarrassing?” He fakes a gasp. “Never!”

Julie rolls her eyes, but laughs. “Okay, Dad.”

“Sunset Curve is playing today?” Rose questions out loud, looking at the finalized setlist. “Good for them! It says they are from your school Julie. Do you know them?”

Julie’s eyes widen and Carlos starts to laugh. “I think she definitely does. Are they your boyfriends?”

“Ew, gross Carlos!” Julie shouts, hitting her brother upside the head. “It isn’t like that.”

“Julie don’t hit your brother,” Ray scolds and Carlos sticks his tongue our at her. “And Carlos stop pestering your sister.”

“Ha!” Julie laughs at her little brothers dejected look but then turns to her mom. “I have met them a few times since school started. They’re nice.”

Ray raises his one eyebrow, you know the one that means business. “They’re just nice?”

“Who’s nice?”

The whole Molina family turns around to see all four Sunset Curve boys standing there, each one looking more nervous than the other.

“Hey guys,” Julie says, breaking the tension. “You, uh, excited?” She pauses. “I mean, excited about performing.”

Carlos lets out another loud laugh, enjoying his sisters pain and decides to add to it. “So these are your boyfriends?”

“Carlos!” Julie glares at her brother as the four boys shout out some variation of denial.

“Hello boys, I’m Rose,” Julie’s mom steps in front of her family, holding out her hand for the boys to shake. They all grasp it, enthusiastically. “I have been to a few of your shows. You guys are really talented.”

“Thanks you so much!” Reggie exclaims. “That means so much coming from you. My mom’s a huge fan.”

“Just your mom?” Rose jokes.

Luke clears his throat. “Rose and the Petal Pushers is actually the first concert Reggie and I went to. Watching you play guitar inspired me to start taking classes.” He smiles, his very Luke kind of smile. “It means a lot that you like our music. It feels like we are actually doing something right then.”

His tone makes Julie believe that there is an underlining meaning to his words. Like maybe someone doesn’t believe in what the guys are doing. Which is ridiculous since they are so talented. It is only a matter of time before they are off making platinum albums and touring all over the world. At least Julie thinks so.

“I’m Ray, Julie’s father,” he puts his arm around Julie, bringing her closer to him, as if he was trying to protect her from the four boys.

“I’m Alex,” The blond says first. “This is Luke, Reggie, and Bobby. We’re Sunset Curve.”

“Tell your friends,” Reggie adds, laughing. He stops when he sees Rays serious face, “Sir.”

Rose playfully smacks Ray in the arm, making him finally let go of his grasp on Julie. “Stop it, Ray.”

He holds his hands up in surrender, “I have no idea what you are implying.”

“Let’s leave Julie alone,” Ray is about to protest but Rose shoots him a glare. “You have to start setting up for pictures anyway and I have to meet up with some of the board members. Come along Carlos. We will meet up with you later, Julie. At the performers tent?”

She gives her daughter a pointed look, and Julie knows she is going to have to tell her mom everything. But maybe not everything because her parents still don’t know about Halloween night and the fact that Flynn and Julie went to Bobby’s party.

Julie nods her head, knowing her mom won't let it go.

"It was nice to see you boys. I can't wait for the set tonight," Rose says as she guides Carlos and Ray away from the group, leaving Julie and the boys alone.

“You’re mom seems so cool,” Bobby says first.

“The coolest,” Julie responds, looking at her feet awkwardly.

“Does your dad bake?” Reggie questions. “He looks like a dad who bakes.”

Alex sighs, “I’m sorry about him. You don’t have to answer.”

Julie laughs, because it is such an Alex thing for him to apologize for his bandmates.

“No it’s fine,” she smiles. “He does actually bake. Not much of a chef though.”

“Sweet! I bet he makes a mean chocolate chip cookie,” Reggie sighs, probably daydreaming about cookies. “Is it too forward if I ask to come over sometime?”

“Yes, dude,” Luke taps Reggie on the arm, signaling him to chill out. “Stop being so weird.”

Reggie sighs, looking sad. He mumbles an apology towards Julie before slowly moving behind the boys.

“Anyways,” Bobby cuts in. “You wanna go scare some people?”

“Scare them how?” Julie asks. The Battle of the Bands is at an open field. How can they go about scaring people when they can see you coming?

Luke laughs. “We tell other performers that they have been switched to go on in five minutes.”

“Isn’t that kind of mean?” Julie shakes her head.

“It isn’t hurting anyone and we’re teenage dudes. Well except for you. We have to have some fun before we go on in seven hours,” Bobby says.

“C’mon, you’re making this face.” All four boys wrap their arms around each other and scrunch their eyebrows and their lips; in unison.

“That,” Julie pauses, holding in a laugh. “Is not my face.”

Luke nods his head, “It’s your face.”

“It will be fun, Julie,” Alex says. “Watching other performers freak out and scramble around because they don’t think they are actually ready? Hilarious!”

If Alex is all for this, it can’t be too bad? Maybe it will be fun.

“Let’s do this!” Julie says, throwing caution to the wind.

The four boys cheer before leading the way towards the performers tents.

***

They had already scared two groups when Willie shows up. He actually crashes into Alex while he is skateboarding, but they both laugh it off.

“Sorry I almost pancaked you,” Willie says, taking his helmet off.

“It’s no problem,” Alex’s voice cracks.

Julie smiles at the interaction. It seems like someone has a crush on Willie.

“So whatcha guys doing?”

“Pranking people,” Luke says. “Care to join?”

Willie laughs and says, with no questions asked, “Obviously!”

***

**NOVEMBER 1995, LOS FELIZ HIGH SCHOOL**

“It became a tradition for every Battle of the Bands,” Julie says to the group. “It is amazing that no one ever caught on. Every year people fell for it.”

She is smiling, remembering how the boys let her (and sometimes Willie) in on their band antics. They always made her feel like she was a part of the band, including her in practically everything.

Sharing the story with other people was something she never thought would be happening. It was going to be an inside joke within the group. She did leave out the whole meeting her parents thing though. These people don’t need to know how embarrassing her family is.

“Thank you for sharing, Julie,” Miss Melissa says.

“Are you going to this years Battle of the Bands?” Calvin asks.

Julie stops moving for a second and her breath catches. Battle of the Bands is this Saturday. She has heard her parents talking about it while they believed she wasn’t around. They are going but Julie hasn’t even thought about this year. What would she even spend her time doing if the boys aren’t there to create havoc?

“Uh,” Julie clears her throat. “No.”

“Oh.”

The room goes silent. The other teenagers have all come to the same conclusion. Julie didn’t just lose one person. She lost three.

“Well I believe that is all for today,” Miss Melissa says, breaking the silence. “I hope you make the most out of the rest of your week. Keep writing in your journals and know that I am always a phone call away if you need anything. Happy Thanksgiving! I will see you all next Wednesday!”

Everyone gets up, except for Julie and Carrie.

They wait for them to be alone before they turn to each other.

“I’m glad you shared,” Carrie says.

“Kind of felt like I had no choice,” Julie responds. “Almost everyone here has shared at least twice already. And what you said it true, by the way.”

Carrie gasps, “Did Julie Molina herself just admit that I, Carrie Wilson, am right?”

Julie laughs, “I didn’t say those words exactly.”

“I’ll still take it.” Carrie smiles. “I liked that story by the way. Bobby never told me about that. Then again, I bet there is a lot he didn’t tell me.” Carrie’s smile turns into a frown and before Julie can make a comment, Carrie says. “Anyways, this was nice. You should really call Flynn, though.”

“I will,” Julie states. Both girls stand up and gather their things. “Thank you, Carrie.”

Carrie smiles, “Don’t mention it.”

The girls go their separate ways once they leave the school building.

Julie’s dad is waiting in the parking lot. He is giving her a confused look, knowing that Carrie and Julie haven’t been friends since middle school. And seeing the girls being cordial to each other is a little shocking.

“How was therapy, _mija_?” He questions when Julie sits in the passenger seat.

“It was . . . ” she pauses, smiling a little to herself. “Good.”

Ray smiles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! 
> 
> I am really starting to love writing this. I keep imaging scenes and I can't wait for them to all come together!
> 
> I don't know if anyone else has like inner voices when they read but I do and it happens a lot when I am writing for this. I don't know if it comes across awkward in writing but I picture the actors and how they say things. Their nuances and stuff. So I hope it comes across okay, but I am literally picturing the scenes in my head as I write and I just hope I am not the only one. 
> 
> I have no idea if that made sense but anyways! 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed!


	5. Chapter Five

**DECEMBER 1995, LOS ANGELES**

School was rough. Julie left after seventh period. She knows her parents will be getting a call from Mrs. Harrison and she will just have to deal with the consequences when she gets home. Everyone was talking about the Winter Formal next week and it only brought back memories with boys, Luke especially. And then to have to sit through music class while everyone waits for Julie to do something, but then just get disappointed when she just sits there. _No thanks_.

She knows that it is a long walk, and somewhat dangerous, but for some reason, walking through the city of Los Angeles is comforting. No one knows who she is. No one knows her story. Every person who passes her has their own story. Their own things to worry about. No one cares about what is going on in Julie Molina’s life.

To think that this time last year, the boys and Julie were helping her dad decorate the house for Christmas. Now the house is barely decorated because the Molina’s don’t really have the Christmas spirit. Seeing all the houses with their lights hung and light-up reindeer on their front lawns, makes Julie’s eyes kind of well up. This year is going to be the worst Christmas of probably her whole life.

Without realizing where she was going, Julie ends up at a cemetery; thee cemetery. Her feet take her down each aisle until she ends up at the one section that isn’t alphabetical. Luke Patterson, Alex Joyner, and Reggie Peters are buried right next to each other. Something that Julie’s parents made sure happened. Even though the boys have their own families, the boys spent more time at Julie’s house than anywhere else and Julie’s parents knew that the boys couldn’t be separated.

“Hey guys,” Julie says, sitting down on the grass in between the headstones. “I know I haven’t been here in a while. Not since the funeral actually. I’ve meant to come by but things haven’t been quite easy.” She sighs, mindlessly pulling the grass from the ground.

To anyone walking by, they would think she was crazy. A seventeen year old girl talking to air, on the verge of balling her eyes out. But Julie takes comfort in the fact that this is a cemetery and everyone walking through here is going through the same thing she is. Missing a loved one, or ones.

She talks for a while. About school, her family, the book she read in English class. She talks them about pretty much anything but the fact that they are dead and she is slowly losing her mind without them. Julie is so lost in thought that she doesn’t notice when Willie sits across from her.

“You scared me.”

“Sorry,” he chuckles. “I didn’t mean to intrude or anything. I just like to come here to think a lot. Clear my head.”

“Does it work?” Julie questions. “Does it clear your head?”

“Sometimes,” he says. “It makes me feel closer to him. To them.”

Julie sighs before letting everything out that she has been holding in. “I feel like this is something I will never get past. I don’t know how everyone around me is just going on. And I’m here stuck.”

“Everyone grieves at their own pace, Julie. And just because everyone isn’t showing it, doesn’t mean they aren’t hurting.” He reaches over and grabs her hand. “You’re a really passionate person, Julie. And you wear your emotions on your sleeve at all times. It only makes sense that you wouldn’t be able to hide your pain.”

He squeezes her hand and Julie smiles with watery eyes. “Luke always said that. He said it made me a wrecking ball of a writer.”

**DECEMBER 1993, LOS ANGELES**

Fridays spent at the Molinas are a tradition. The Sunset Curve boys, Willie, and Flynn are over every Friday for dinner and a movie. This Friday was spent decorating the house for Christmas. Ray loves to go all out and the kids were more than happy to lend a helping hand. The house is all decked out and now they are all in the Molina’s living room watching Home Alone 2: Lost in New York. Ray, Rose, Carlos, and Julie are on the couch. Willie and Alex are sitting next to each other on the love seat (Julie could see them holding hands but trying to hide it). Flynn is sitting on the arm chair with Reggie in front of her. And Luke is sitting in front of Julie on the floor. It’s everyone’s designated spots for movie night.

The movie had just ended and everyone is talking and laughing when Luke looks up at Julie and nods his head towards the kitchen. He gets up and Julie follows after. Everyone notices’ but no one says anything.

“What’s up?” Julie questions Luke as she grabs the empty pizza box and places it near the back door. She is about to grab another one when Luke takes it from her hand.

“I-uh,” he hesitates. “Uhm.”

“Are you okay?” Julie asks.

“No, yes.” He pauses. “I am definitely okay. I just need to ask you something.”

She smiles. “Okay. Ask me.”

Luke clears his throat. He shouldn’t be nervous. This is Julie. The same Julie that has been one of his closest friends for the past year. She has been there for him through some family drama. She has helped him with school work. They have even wrote songs together. This should be easy, but does Luke really want to jeopardize their friendship? Does she even feel what he has been feeling? She has to.

“Did you want to go out with me tomorrow?” He rushes out.

“I thought we were already all hanging out tomorrow?” Julie questions, practically obliviously.

He sighs. _It’s now or never_.

“I mean just you and me. Like a date.”

“Oh,” Julie says. “Yeah, okay.”

“You don’t have to if—“ he stops, “wait, you said yes?”

Julie laughs. Luke is smiling wildly and honestly she can’t even believe this is happening. Luke Patterson. One of her closest friends and most sought after sophomores at Los Feliz wants to go on a date with her, Julie Molina. Every girl would kill to be her right now.

She has never told the boys this but pretty much half the school has approached her and Flynn asking about the boys and whether they were single. They wanted to know everything about them. Julie kept it short but she couldn’t deny the little bit of jealously when girls fawned over Luke. She has only known the Sunset Curve boys for a little over a year but they have become practically family. Luke though; Luke is special. Some of Julie favorite memories of this year is when her and Luke are writing songs together. It is almost like their brains are connected. Which is weird because they are definitely polar opposites. But they click and Julie has been falling . . . _hard_.

“Yes Luke,” she places her hand on his arm. “I would love to go on a date with you tomorrow.”

“Sweet.”

***

“I have nothing to wear,” Julie groans, face planting onto her bed.

Flynn shakes her head even though she knows her best friend can no longer see her. “Get it together Julie. This isn’t just some random boy. It’s Luke.”

“Exactly!” Julie jumps up from her bed. “This is Luke. Dorky, energetic, crazy talented Luke. He could literally like anyone. But he wants to date me?”

Julie is prepared for it, but she still flinches when Flynn hits her arm.

“Luke would be insane if he didn’t like you. You’re freaking amazing, Julie. And don’t you ever think other wise. Luke is ever so lucky that you so happen to like him back.” She grasps Julie’s hand and gives it a squeeze. “It’s the eyes, isn’t it?”

She laughs, saying sarcastically, “it is definitely the eyes.” Shaking her head, she squeezes Flynn’s hand back. “I just really like him a lot, y’know? I also don’t want to ruin our friendship. His band are some of my favorite people in the world, besides you of course. I have no idea what I would do without them. If Luke and I became serious and then possibly break up, would that ruin everything?”

Her best friend shakes her head, “You can’t think like that, Jules. We are young, okay?” She shakes Julies hands. “Who knows what might happen between you and Luke later on, but right now? You guys are definitely vibing. It is almost like you guys weremeant to be together. Enjoy this time. Go on numerous dates. Be Julie and Luke. You deserve this, okay?”

“You make it sound like we won’t be around for much longer,” Julie says back.

“I mean, who knows? Nothing is guaranteed. You are also both crazy talented, who knows where life might take you?” Flynn says, rummaging through Julie’s closet. She knows Julie has the perfect outfit; she just needs to find it.

Julie grumbles, “Hopefully somewhere together.”

Flynn throws one of Julie’s sweaters at her, “Stop that. You are going to make it big, whether you are with Luke or without.”

The two girls just stare at each other, Flynn with her arms crossed and Julie with a smile of appreciation. She knows she can always count on Flynn to ground her. No matter what, Flynn is there to support her. Julie couldn’t have asked for a better best friend.

“I think this might be prefect,” Julie says, leaning down and picking up the sweater from the floor.

The girls smile at each other.

***

“Julie!” Carlos screams from downstairs. “Lover boy Luke is here!”

“Oh my God,” Julie turns to Flynn, eyes wide. “I don’t think I am ready!”

Flynn laughs, “You are definitely ready, Jules.”

“Are you sure?” Julie questions, frantically.

“Yes, it is just Luke.”

Julie nods her head, “You’re right. This is Luke.”

Both the girls look at each other in the eyes and without having to say anything else, head downstairs.

Luke is talking to Ray when Julie descends down the stairs, but stops whatever he is saying once he sees Julie. They smile at each other, and Julie blushes.

_This can’t be real life_.

***

Luke decided to take Julie on a picnic. Restaurants are too loud and movie theaters don’t give anyone a chance to really talk. He wanted to be able to actually have a discussion with Julie. Without the boys around. Without a bunch of noise.

“I’ve always wanted to come Griffith Park,” Julie says, watching as Luke places the blanket down for them to sit on. “This is really nice, Luke.”

The sun is just starting to set, leaving about an hour for daylight. But the sky is beautiful and the colors are practically setting a tone. It’s perfect. At least Julie thinks so. Luke is starting to place a bunch of different containers onto the blanket and Julie realizes that they are the same containers that normally belong in her cabinet at home.

“Did my mom make the food?” Julie asks, taking a seat on the blanket.

“Maybe,” Luke says, not looking Julie in the eyes. “I asked if she could make some of your favorites.”

Julie smiles, placing her hand onto Luke’s, “That is so sweet. Thank you.”

He shrugs his shoulders, “I just wanted to make this perfect.” Julie notices that he still hasn’t looked at her and keeps picking at the lids on the containers. “You mean a lot to me Julie. I just-I don’t want to mess anything up.”

“Luke,” Julie sighs. He still hasn’t looked at her, making her use her hand to grasp his chin and turn his head towards her. “I have been worried too. We are such good friends and I don’t want to ruin that. You and the guys have become family to me but . . .”

“But what?” Luke asks, his voice hopeful.

She smiles at the boy. “I like you, Luke. A lot. I just don’t want everything to become weird.”

“Weird how?” Luke asks.

Julie sighs, picking at her nails. “I don’t want our whole dynamic to come undone. I love hanging out with you and the guys. Friday’s at my house are the best. I don’t want any of that to change because we are dating.”

“Oh, we’re dating now?”

“Oh-uh,” Julie blushes. “I mean, if you wanted to. I’m not forcing you or anything.” She stops moving for a second, trying to calm her breathing. “I just kind of thought that since this was a date and we obviously like each other . . .”

“I said you mean a lot to me, not that I liked you,” Luke butts in, laughing.

Julie knows he is joking. Over the past year, she has learned how to handle Luke’s sense of humor. He’s also passionate and super chaotic. But those are just some things Julie likes most about him.

“I’m kidding, Jules,” he says. “I like you, a lot, too.”

They both smile at each other.

***

The picnic was nice, the food was amazing and Julie and Luke could not stop talking. Everything was going perfectly.

“Before this night ends, I have a surprise for you,” Luke says to Julie while standing in front of her house. He insisted on walking her to her door.

“Okay,” Julie says, letting Luke guide her to the studio out back.

The studio was originally Rose’s. She wrote many of her bands hit songs in the garage. When she disbanded the band, she made Julie help redecorate, so Julie would be more comfortable while writing and composing. Rose wanted Julie to have a safe space; it just ended up being a safe space for Sunset Curve as well.

Julie and Luke sit on the couch against the wall, Rose’s old acoustic guitar on his lap.

“I have been kind of working on something,” he says shyly, fumbling the pick between his fingers. “It’s different than my usual stuff.”

She grasps his shaking hand with her own. “You can show me, Luke. No judgement.”

He laughs, “I know. I’m just nervous.”

“Thee Luke Patterson,” she gasps. “Nervous? Never!”

“Alright, alright,” he says. “You said no judgment.”

Julie puts her hands up in surrender. “I was just joking. I’d love to hear it.”

“I only have a few verses and some on the chorus. It’s honestly not that good. I was just messing around with the melody and some lyrics came to my head the other day. But it is nothing—“

“Luke!” Julie interrupts. “There is no need for you to be this nervous. It’s just me here.”

“Exactly, Jules. It’s you. I have never been one to be nervous around a girl, but you’re different.” He sighs, shaking his head. “I care about you a lot and respect your opinion more than anyone. I wasn’t going to tell you so soon but I think I am trying to write you a song?”

Julie is speechless. _Did he just say he is writing me a song?_

“Well I was hoping we can write it together. Is this too weird?”

“No!” Julie rushes out. “It’s just—no one has ever wrote me a song before.”

Luke looks at Julie with disbelief. “That has got to be a lie.”

“It isn’t but I appreciate you thinking that a bunch of people are just constantly writing songs for me,” she laughs. “It doesn’t matter though. I just really want to hear what _you_ have so far.”

“Okay,” he says, clearing his throat. Julie watches as he places the guitar more comfortably on his lap. His hands fumble a little, strumming a few chords to make sure the guitar is tuned. “Just bare with me, okay?”

Julie nods her head, not breaking the stillness of the room.

Luke starts playing the beginning chords, the studio being filled with a beautiful melody.

_“_ _Step into my world_

_Bittersweet love story 'bout a girl_

_Shook me to the core_

_Voice like an angel_

_I've never heard before.”_

For the second time in under ten minutes, Julie Molina had been left speechless.

***

**DECEMBER 1995, LOS ANGELES**

**ENTRY #13**

_I visited your graves today. I didn’t think I could ever go there again, but there was something calming about it. I felt like I was closer to you guys for some reason. And Willie showed up. He says he goes a lot to talk to Alex. He and I talked for a while before he walked me home._

_Willie got me thinking about our first date, Luke. Two years ago, today. The start of our relationship. It feels like so long ago. We wrote Perfect Harmony that night. All night actually. Dad was so pissed when he found us out in the studio at two in the morning. Do you remember that? You were terrified to come to the house for a month after that night._

_I skipped out of school early today. I did something you always wanted me to but never had the actual guts to do. And for good reason because now I am grounded. I don’t do much these days anyways, but not being able to go out because I am in trouble just sucks. I have this feeling you would have been able to talk my parents down and let me off with a warning._

_You always had a way with words. Whether it was in person or writing lyrics. You knew exactly what to say, at least most of the time._

_For some reason, every day that I wake up, for a split second, I forget that you guys have died. I open my eyes and I think, “I wonder what crazy things the boys are going to drag me into today?” But then it is gone in an instant and I remember that you guys are dead. There is no coming back from that._

_I don’t know if there really is a heaven or hell, or whatever. I have been questioning everything lately. But I hope you guys are there somewhere, still watching out for me._

_Because I think I can do this as long as you guys are at least watching over me. It is going to take a while and I don’t think I will ever be the same, but I want to be happy again. You guys would want me to be happy. I’m going to try, for you guys._

_And for myself._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! It's been awhile but I haven't abandoned the story. I have just been super busy with work and honestly exhausted, so I have been slowly working on this chapter over the past couple of weeks. But I finally finished it!
> 
> Reggie and Alex's last names were released while I was in the middle of writing this so I changed Reggie's to Peters, obviously but I am keeping Alex's Joyner because of the coffee shop and my pun is immaculate. 
> 
> As always, I hope you guys liked the chapter. I will try to post the next one a lot sooner!


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